GRAVE EXPERTS AWAITS VISITS AND PRAYERS OF RELATIVES

GRAVE EXPERTS AWAITS VISITS AND PRAYERS OF RELATIVES


Foto: Makam San Diego Hills. (Dok: San Diego Hills Galeri)

Before visiting the graves, we should understand the main purpose of visiting the graves, have knowledge and knowledge so that we don't make the wrong intentions and actions when visiting the graves. The main purpose of visiting the graves is to remember death, because every human being will surely die at one time. The human body will decompose in the ground, while the spirit will be held accountable for its deeds and deeds in the world. With the right intention and method of visiting the graves, God willing, humans will realize how small they are before their Lord. Which means that there is nothing to be proud of, because no matter how high our position, knowledge and possessions are, the grave is the future home that will be occupied later. 

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Grave Pilgrimage Suggestions
Remembering death makes people more alert and careful in living their lives. In addition, it is not easy to be shackled in a lifestyle that is not good. Rasulullah shallallahu alaihi wasallam said:

كُنْتُ نَهَيْتُكُمْ عَنْ زِيَارَةِ الْقُبُورِ فَزُورُوهَا فَإِنَّهَا تُزَهِّدُ فِي الدُّنْيَا و َتُذَكِّرُ الْآخِرَةَ

"(In the past) I forbade you to visit the graves, so (now) make a pilgrimage to the graves, in fact visiting the graves makes you ascetic in this world and reminds you of the hereafter." (Reported by Imam Ibn Majah Rahimahullah died in 887 AD in Qazwin Iran). 

Regarding the sunnah of visiting graves, one of them is explained by Hujjatul Islam Al-Imam Abu Hamid Muhammad bin Muhammad Al-Ghazali Ath-Thusi Asy-Syafi'i Al-Asy'ari or Imam Al-Ghazali Rahimahullah (died December 19, 1111 AD in Thus, Iran) in his book Ihya' Ulumuddin:

زيارة القبور مستحبة على الجملة للتذكر والاعتبار وزيارة قبور الصالحين مستحبة لأجل التبرك مع الاعتبار

"Visiting the graves is sunnah in general with the aim of remembering (death) and taking lessons, and visiting the graves of righteous people is sunnah with the aim of tabarruk (getting blessings) and lessons."
Agree on 4 Madhhabs
Visiting graves in this case is also a form of learning or remembering and emulating the good deeds that are visited. The entire aimmatul mazhahib (Imam Syaifi'i, Imam Maliki, Imam Hanbali and Imam Hanafi Rahimahumullah) agree on the sunnah of visiting the graves, as conveyed by KH. Ali Maksum Krapyak Rahimahullah (died December 7, 1989 AD at the Tomb of Dongkelan, Bantul, Yogyakarta) in the book Hujjah Expertssunnah Wal Jama'ah:

زيارة القبور تجيزها مذاهب المسلمين كلها

"Visiting graves is permitted by all Muslim sects,"
The thing we have to do when visiting graves is to pray for people who are in graves. Prayers and remembrance of pilgrims with the intention of the reward for the deceased will reach the deceased (deceased). 
Therefore, Syekh Nawawi Banten, Rahimahullah, emphasized that it is an obligation for those who are still alive to send gifts of prayer to spirits who have died. 

هَدَايَا الْأَحْيَاءِ لِلْأَمْوَاتِ الدُّعَاءُ وَالْإِسْتِغْفَارُ

"The gift of living people to those who have died is prayer and asking forgiveness from Allah (istighfar) for them." (Syaikh Nawawi Banten, Nihayatuz Zain, Beirut, Darul Fikr, tt, page 281). 

Until Dead
Therefore, sending prayers, be it Al Fatihah to forgiveness for the spirits who have died is something that is very meaningful because the reward will arrive. 
The scholars also mentioned, as stated by Imam Muhyiddin Syarf An-Nawawi Ad-Dimasyqi Asy-Syafi'i Al-Asy'ari Rahimahullah, who stated that the agreement that prayers from people who are still alive to those who have died is beneficial and the reward will be get to him. 

One of the arguments used to support this opinion is the word of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala as follows:

وَالَّذِينَ جَاءُوا مِنْ بَعْدِهِمْ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَا اغْفِرْ لَنَا وَلِإِخْوَانِنَا الَّذِينَ سَبَقُونَا بِالْإِيمَانِ

"Those who came after them (Muhajirin and Ansar), they prayed, 'Our Lord, forgive us and our brothers and sisters who have believed before us." (QS. Al-Hashr verse 10). 

??? جُّوا بِقَوْلِهِ تَعَالَى وَالَّذِينَ جَاءُوا مِنْ بَعْدِهِمْ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَا اغْفِرْ لَنَا وَل ِإِخْوَانِنَا الَّذِينَ سَبَقُونَا بِالْإِيمَانِ

“The scholars agree that prayer for people who have died will benefit them and the reward will also reach them. These scholars argued with the words of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, Those who came after them (Muhajirin and Ansar), they prayed: 'Our Lord, forgive us and our brothers and sisters who have believed before us". (QS. Al-Hashr verse 10),'” (Imam Muhyiddin Syarf An-Nawawi Asy-Syafi'i, Al-Adzkar An-Nawawiyyah, Jakarta, Darul Pole Al-Islamiyah, 1st print, 1425 H/2004 AD, page 180 ). 

Tales of the Tabi'in Age
There is an interesting story told by Imam Muhammad Bin Abu Bakar Al-Ushfuri Rahimahullah in the Book of Al-Mawaidh Al-Usfuriyah, about Sayyid Thabit bin Aslam Al-Bunani Rahimahullah (died 127 H / 744 AD in Basrah Iraq aged 86), a scholar tabi'in senior disciple of the companions of Rasulullahshalallahu alaihi wasallam, Anas bin Malik Al-Anshari radhiyallahu 'anhu (died 709 AD in Basrah Iraq), while dreaming and entering the grave. A tabi'in dream, one of the karomah given by Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to Sayyid Thabit Al Bunani. 

It is said that Tsabit Al Bunani never fell asleep every time he visited the graves except for a few nights. And at one time he had a dream. The dream he had was showing that all the grave experts came out of their graves. 
From the story of Thabit Al-Bunani, it is explained that it turns out that people who have died, or the occupants of the graves, need prayer messages from people who are still alive in the world, especially prayer messages from their families. 

In the dream, Thabit Al-Bunani saw them coming out in luxurious clothes with shining faces. They were given trays filled with various foods. However, in the midst of them was seen a young man who was disheveled. His face was pale, his clothes were tattered. Her tears dripped. He also doesn't look like he's carrying food like the others. 

All grave experts return to their respective graves with beaming faces. They are happy. Except for this young man, he came home with his head down and deathly pale. Seeing that something was different about the young man, Sayyidina Tasbit greeted him and asked him, "Hey Youth, who are you really? They are seen bringing food and returning happily, whereas you find no food. You came home empty-handed, full of sorrow. 
What was the young man's answer? Here is the sad expression:
"O Imam of the Muslims, I became a stranger in their midst. No one remembers me at all even if only with kindness and prayer. As for them, there are children, family and relatives who pray, who send rewards for good deeds and alms. Every Friday night the reward goes to them."
It turned out that this young man did not have a family, but he still had a mother. After his death, his mother remarried. At that time, he intended to perform the pilgrimage with his mother. But when he arrived in Egypt, he was picked up by death. Then, after his mother remarried, he didn't remember her even if he just prayed. 
Sayyidina Thabit felt sorry for the young man. Then the tabi'in asked again about his mother,
"O young man, tell me where your mother lives. I will tell you about your situation."

The young man immediately replied: "O priest, my mother is from this city and she lives in this house. Tell her my situation. If she doesn't believe it, then tell her that in her pocket there are 100 silver mitsqols left by her father, and that is her right. She must be will believe."

Sayyidina Thabit Al-Bunani immediately looked for the young man's mother. When he met him, he told him about his son's condition. His mother only believed when he conveyed the child's message about his father's inheritance. 
After searching, it turned out that 100 silver mistqols were indeed in his pocket. He immediately fainted. After he regained consciousness, he handed over all the money to Sayyid Thabit to give in charity. 

On the following Friday night, Sayyidina Thabit dreamed of meeting the young man again. This time he is the same as the other residents of the grave. He was dressed luxuriously and looked very happy. Then he said to Sayyid Thabit,
"O priest, may Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala bless you as you have loved me. In fact, it is clear that both of them can hurt those in the grave when they commit immorality. On the other hand, both of them will make the graves happy if they do good."

Grave Expert Awaits Prayer
As explained in the book Al-Adzkar An-Nawawiyyah Imam An-Nawawi Rahimahullah (died 1277 AD in Nawa Syuriah), which was quoted by Shaykh Muhammad bin Umar An-Nawawi Al-Bantani Rahimahullah (died 1897 AD in Jannatul Ma'la Mecca) in Nihayatuz Zain's book as follows:

قال النووي في الأذكار أجمع العلماء على أن الدعاء للأموات ينفعهم ويصلهم ثوابه اه روي عن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم أنه قال ما الم يت في قبره إلا كالغريق المغوث بفتح الواو المشددة أي الطالب لأن يغاث ينتظر دعوة تلحقه من ابنه أو أخيه أو صديق له فإذا لحقته كانت أحب إليه من الدنيا وما فيها

“Imam Nawawi said in his book, Al-Adzkar, 'The scholars agree that prayer for the dead is beneficial and reaches them', narrated from the Prophet Muhammad sallallaahu alaihi wasallam: 'There is no corpse in his grave unless he is like a drowned person. askinghelp (kal ghariqil mughawwats) with the vowel fathah on the wawu letter which is tasdid, that is, a person asking for help - he waits for a drop of prayer sent by his child, sibling or friend. Therefore, when he gets a prayer, he likes it more than the world and all that is in it,'” (Kitab Nihayatuz Zain, page 281). 

There is a hadith, which confirms that people who have died, actually can still receive rewards in the form of good prayers recited by relatives or friends specifically intended for him. 
In fact, it is described, the person who has died was very happy with the prayer, beyond the joy of getting wealth as big as the world and its contents. 

إخوتي الأحباء! قد عَلِمْنا أنَّ أهْلَ القُبُورِ يستَبْشِرُوْن ويَفرَحُوْن بزِيارَةِ أقَاربِهم وأصْدِقائِهم وبدُ God bless you

My dear brothers! We have learned that the inhabitants of their graves rejoice and delight in the visits of their relatives and friends, with their prayers, and in awarding rewards and rewards, and they are always waiting for relatives who do not visit them. 

وعن عبد الله بن عباس - رضي الله عنهما - قال : قال النَّبيّ الكريمُ صلّى الله تعالى عليه وآله وسلّم : ما الْمَيّتُ في القَبْرِ إ God bless you ِيقٍ فإذا لَحِقَتْه كانَتْ أحَبَّ إليه مِن الدُّنيا ومَا فيها وإنَّ Allah, عزّGod bless you َحْيَاءِ إلى الأَمْوَاتِ الاِسْتِغفارُ لهم. (أخرجه البيهقي في "شعب الإيمان"، ٦/٢٠٣، (٧٩٠٥)

History from Friend Abdullah bin Abbas Radhiyallahu Anhu (died 687 M in Taif) said, that Rasulullah sallallaahu alaihi wasallam said: "A corpse in his grave, like a drowning person asking for help. He awaits the prayers of fathers, mothers, children, and friends who trusted. If the prayer reaches him, then it is preferable to him than the world and everything in it. And indeed Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala conveys the prayers of the inhabitants of the world for graves as big as mountains. As for the gifts of the living to the dead, it is to ask forgiveness from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala for them and give charity on their behalf." (Narrated by Imam Ad-Dailami Rahimahullah and Imam Al-Baihaqi Asy-Syafi'i Rahimahullah in the book of Syu ' abul Faith 6/203-7905)
Also contained in the Book of Mirqatul Mafatih Syarah Misykatul Mashabih (Istighfar and Repentance Chapter Juz 4 page 1632 hadith 2355) by Al-Imam Nuruddin Abu Al-Hasan Ali bin Sultan Muhammad Al-Hirawi Al-Qari Al-Hanafi Al-Maturidi or Imam Mulla Ali Al-Qari Rahimahullah (died 1014 H / 1605 AD inJannatul Ma'la Mecca). 

It is also found in the book ٢٥ حكاية عن أهل القبور (25 Hikayah An Ahlil Qubur, page 19) by Fadhilatusy Shaykh Muhammad Ilyas Al-Athar Al-Qadri Al-Hanafi Rahimahullah from Pakistan. 
Not only ordered, Rasulullah shallallahu alaihi wasallam also did it directly. It is mentioned in hadith narrations that he prayed for the dead and buried in the Baqi Gharqad cemetery:

اللهمَّ اغفرْ لأهلِ بقيعي

"O Allah, have mercy on the people buried in Baqi Gharqad". (HR. Imam Muslim Rahimahullah died in 875 AD in Naisabur Iran). 
Preferably Close Relatives
Istighfar prayers for corpses are prioritized by relatives, because they are the closest, both in lineage and social relations. In addition, this is a real form of strong family ties (friendship) between them. So, the bond was never broken, even though death had separated their realms. That bond will remain forever. 
Purpose and Adab
The main purpose of the pilgrimage is to read the prayers and dhikr that are given to the deceased. In addition to reciting prayers, pilgrims should also maintain the etiquette of visiting graves as recommended. 

The adab is explained in detail in the book Tafsir As-Siraj Al-Munir Fi Al-I'anah 'Ala Ma'rifah Ba'dh Ma'ani Kalam Rabbina Al-Hakim Al-Khabir by Al-Imam Al-'Allamah Syamsuddin Muhammad bin Muhammad Asy-Syarbini Al-Qahiri Asy-Syafi'i Al-Khatib or Imam Khatib Asy-Syirbini Rahimahullah (died1570 M / 977 H in Cairo, Egypt). 

وينبغي لمن زار القبور أن يتأدّب بآدابها ويحضر قلبه في إتيانها، ولا يكون حظه منها الطواف عليها فقط فإنّ هذه حالة God bless you all ب الجلوس عليها. 
ويسلم إذا دخل المقابر فيقول: «السلام عليكم دار قوم مؤمنين، وإنا إن شاء الله بكم لاحقون». وإذا وصل على قبر ميته الذي يعرفه سلم عليه أيضاً، وأتاه من قبل وجهه لأنه في زيارته كمخاطبه حياً، ثم يعتبر ب من صار تحت التراب، وانقطع عن الأهل والأحباب، ويتأمّل حال من مضى من إخوانه كيف انقطعت آمالهم ولم تغن عنهم أموالهم، و مجيء التراب على محاسنهم ووجوههم، وافترقت في التراب أجزاؤهم، وترمل من بعدهمنساؤهم، وشمل ذل اليتم أولادهم وأنه لا بدّ صائر إلى مصيرهم، وأنّ حاله كحالهم وماله كمالهم. 

"People who make pilgrimages to cemeteries should behave according to the etiquette of visiting graves and present their hearts when visiting graves. The purpose of coming to the cemetery is not just to walk around, because this behavior is animal behavior. But the purpose of the pilgrimage is to gain the pleasure of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, to repair the ugliness of his heart, to benefit the deceased by reading the Qur'an and prayers by his side. And also he abstains from sitting on graves. 
When he entered the area around the grave he greeted: 'Assalamu alaika dara qaumi mu'minin, wa inna, God willing, bikum lahiqun. Meaning, may peace be on you, O house of believers, indeed, we, if Allah wills, will follow you.' When he arrives at the grave of a dead person he knows, then say hello to him. Come from the direction of the corpse's face, because visiting his grave is like talking to him while alive. Then the pilgrimage person contemplates the condition of people who have been buried underground, who have been separated from their families. 

People who make pilgrimages should also reflect on how their friends who have died are doing. How their dreams had been dashed. How their wealth is no longer helping them. Dust has sprinkled on the beauty of their bodies and faces, their organs have been separated in the ground, then their wives are widowed, their children have become orphans. And later his turn to be like his friends will come. His condition in the grave is exactly the same as the condition of his friends, and his wealth will also be exactly the same as that of his friends (unable to help him)” (Imam Khatib Asy-Syirbini Asy-Syafi'i Rahimahullah Tafsir as-Siraj al-Munir, page 5277). 
That is the adab of visiting the graves recommended in Islam. By knowing and practicing it, one should not act arbitrarily when on a pilgrimage, moreover, the maqbarahs of the pilgrimage are pious people. Hopefully our frequent visits to graves can make reflections, advice and a warning to all of us about death. 
Wallahu A'lam. 

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